TV’s best summer

July 31st, 2007 by Aabra

Which was the best summer on TV:

* Suzanne Somers (Real name Mahoney.) Jiggly, giggly star of that campiest of ’70s shows, Three’s Company. No particular powers, other than a horrid laugh and the ability to earn an income without any discernible talent…

* Jaime Sommers aka The Bionic Woman. She had bionic hearing, bionic legs, a bionic arm, and a bionic dog. And yet could she ever have beaten…

* Buffy Summers, the vampire-slaying cheerleader from Sunnyvale. What match is a snorty laugh or wicked cool hearing for a girl who can bring the motherf’ing dead back to life, and have sex with them– we didn’t get any of that in the ’70s!

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* Three’s Company starring Harry, Hermione, and Ron??

* (Sigh) Yet another article on the alleged Futurama movies. I don’t want anymore god d**ned announcements– I want a place to see and/or buy the d**ned things!! “Bender’s Big Score”?? How ’bout “Here’s $18, Groening, give me my god d**ned movie already”??

* Oops, I’m sorry, Matt, I guess the stars on the covers of Playboy magazines have nothing to do with how Hef rated the centerfold in the sack.

* Is this for real? A Twilight Zone episode with Lee Marvin fighting a robot?

* More cheap TV: fan-made Blake’s 7 episode. I like that the spaceships are clearly models being steered by people in black…

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